why deny ourselves love?

This is about love. You may think this is a crazy statement; especially since it seems to me that love is pretty much all we talk about. Even when we are not talking about love, we are talking about love. It is what most of our conversations are about, at least underneath. When we complain about how others treat us, we are really complaining that they don’t treat us with love. When we look at all the “isms” and prejudices that we experience aren't they all about someone denying us love. And when we are happy or joyful isn't it really because something positive has happened to us that opens up our hearts to love

Maybe I am over-simplifying things. My point really is, we are made from love, for love, to love. When we deny ourselves the opportunity to experience love, in all its forms, we deny ourselves our very essence. In point of fact, we deny our spirits, our souls, ourselves the ultimate nourishment. You know, scientists have discovered that babies will emotionally die or become emotionally dysfunctional if not given love and affection the first year of their lives. So too, we die or become emotionally scarred if we are not given love, if we do not experience love. The profundity of it is almost mind-blowing.

So my question - why would we want to deny ourselves love? ...

Answer - we shouldn't want to and yet we do. Many of us do, either because of bad break ups or because of broken hearts. But love is a majestic feeling. And while it can cause us to descend to the lowest of lows, it can also lift our hearts and spirits. It can bring a glow to our faces, brighten a day and ease pain. The expression “friendship doubles our joy and divides our grief” is true because friendship is based on mutual love.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that love is perfect. It is not. Nor am I saying that all love lasts. We all know that love can end and sometimes it can end cruelly or bitterly. I recognize that sometimes the end of love can be soooo painful, can beat us up soooo badly, we never want to take a chance on love again. I just do not believe that is the answer.

In fact, I’m not so sure it is love that hurts us. When relationships fail, it is not because love fails. Love itself is pure and everlasting. It is the things we do that cause love to change form such that we no longer think love exists. But love is, always was and always will be. When a friend discards us or a lover leaves us or a family member betrays us that is not the end of love, that is that persons abuse of love. It is not the fault of love it is rather the actions of the person. Love does not leave us, a person leaves. Love does not stop,  a person chooses to no longer share it with us.

While these things are painful… very painful, the good news is that LOVE STILL EXISTS. Love is there waiting for us to feel it, touch it, smell it, hear it, taste it, fill us to overflowing, be our experience. Love, again, is who we are, is here for us. We experience it when we love ourselves, we experience it when we step into the world with open arms, trusting love to fill them. We experience it when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and acknowledge that we need love. When we open our arms and hearts to love, when we give the love we need, when we show up expecting love the universe rises up to meet us and fills our lives with love. We just need to open our senses to that love.

The point… we should never deny ourselves love. We should share it with everyone. Pour love into the world. Watch it flow to all those you touch and those around you. Like a ripple in the ocean it will expand and you will find the love you crave, the love you need, the love you deserve. Trust… believe… expect… and it will happen.